darling lily gave began as a small collection of musical sketches piled in a corner with nothing to do. Each one came to be during times of tumultuous emotional change and from all ends of the circuitous, emotional spectrum. As such they began to pile up. Yet while they could certainly spark the memories and emotions of a wider audience, these sketches laid dormant. A mere souvenir to the writer, locked away to be admired by few.
They stayed that way because the writer could not understand where they were coming from. Comprehending their emotional origins was not a skill the writer ever learned. Ignorance provided comfort. All that the writer knew was the sudden appearances of immense feelings. They would well up and wreak havoc, tearing apart any semblance of balance in the writer’s life, sending everything into uncertainty. Creating doubt. Fostering discord. Leaving a hole where something good once rested.
But that is not all it left. Something resembling music could be found among the remnants. A tune or a verse, something seemingly inconsequential. They were picked up and given a home in the mind of the writer. A sort of token for the time spent in turmoil. They became reminders of how things could feel, yet not understood for their true purpose.
The writer proceeded unchanged. Opting to ignore rather than reflect. Choosing to leave the sketches just as they were. Small reminders of a past you can't do anything about or learn from. Why care when there were countless distractions to keep you satiated? Life thus remained unkind and baseless to the writer. A meaningless waiting room between two endless voids. To try was to fail. It made no difference what happened. Bleak to be sure, and it eventually became too much.
Neglecting those emotional remnants was in fact a neglect of self and what it creates in the worst, or best, or whatever, of times. This neglect was self perpetuating and provided a life permeated with loathing and doubt. The writer knew life would extinguish itself like this. It could not continue.
And so the writer turned to those tokens, those sketches, and decided they shouldn't be tokens any longer.
Therapy comes in many forms. Those sketches became the first two albums for darling lily gave. This was the winter of 2015 and as work commenced, sorting and developing the sketches proved cathartic. The work provided a frame on which to build the modern person-hood of the writer. Finally understanding the self as an individual that can thrive by way of an art form, the writer made the act of doing anything meaningful.
In time music began to reflect those emotions from which they originated. They sought to capture the immensity of each one. Yet the body of the work began to divide into multiple distinct sounds. Sounds that were soft and inviting. Sounds that brimmed with wild energy. Sounds that did not seem to share the same beginnings. Still, as they were common to the same impetus, it was decided that any split in the sound of the project should remain under the same name.
darling lily gave
It is the realization of those big emotions, the unruly, banal and wonderful ones, and it has put them somewhere we can get a good look at them. Preferring to see them in full rather than glancing at them in passing.
Emotions are all that we can own in life and this music is the sound they make.